Bust My Buffers!

Posted by: , October 30, 2008 in 9:17 pm

During the first two and a half years of my son’s life I avoided Thomas the Tank Engine like it was the Black Death. 

Well-meaning friends and family would smile into Benjamin’s face, enthusiastically inquiring, “Do you love Thomas?” and I would scowl and begin a diatribe about how disturbing I found subanthropomorphised trains. 

Then, PBS removed It’s a Big, Big World from its daily lineup.Now, I am the woman scouring the A.C. Moore circular for a sale on Thomas the Tank Engine wooden railway cars.  I am the mom who stands in front of a display, clutching a dog-earred catalog of Thomas products.  I am the wife who pulls you aside and whispers (as if they are my last words on this earth), “I think we should buy him Diesel, because he likes to reenact the scenes between the diesels and the steamies.”  I am the friend who walks away from you in a store because I thought I spied an engine that is not shown in my dogearred catalog.

I know way too much about Sir Thopham Hatt.  Lady Hatt.  And, Sir Thopham’s mother’s baggage.  If quizzed, I can tell anyone the differences between Cranky the Crane, Harvey the Crane and Rocky the Crane.  Likewise, don’t even think about trying to pull one over on me when it comes to the Steam Team versus the Narrow Gaugue Engines.  I was there when Mr. Percival got his new bicycle! 

I’ve even taken on that quasi-British accent like Madonna and Gwynneth Paltrow did when they married boys from across the pond.  I think it comes from singing along with that children’s choir every day.  Er, I mean…listening to, not singing along. 

So, if you ever see a small woman clutching a 40% off coupon at A.C. Moore, frantically rifling through packages of overpriced wooden engines and she is muttering something about Knapford Station, introduce yourself—it might just be me!



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