Private Parts

Posted by: , September 14, 2011 in 9:39 am

Buried with ChildrenIn the day and age that we live, you can never be too careful especially when it comes to our children.  It is our job as parents to teach our children about the dangers of the world. This is a job that I take very seriously. I don’t want to scare my children or take away their natural curiosity with people but I do want them to be careful and know what is appropriate and not appropriate for other people to do to them.

One of the big things that we talk about is what kind of touching is okay. Our pediatrician covers this topic every time the kids have a yearly exam and since Jake, Quinn and Claire just had their four year old check up, it was a hot topic.

I decided to take advantage of this and do some more teaching with the kids. We were in the car coming home from said doctor’s appointment so I turned the radio off and they became my captive audience.

“So boys and girls,” I said getting their attention, “Who can touch your private parts?”

My question was met with silence.

“Come on, guys.” I said trying again, “This is important. Who can touch your private parts?”

The car was still silent but this time I could tell that it was because they were thinking about my question.

“Mommy and daddy,” Jake yelled.

“Yeah, that’s right Jake. But mommy and daddy can touch them if they ask you and if you feel bad about it, you can say no,” I clarified. “Who else?”

“Um, the doctor,” Quinn said thoughtfully with Claire and Jake quickly voicing agreement.

“That’s right, Quinn,” I said, “The doctor, mommy and daddy can touch your private parts if you say, its alright.”

I looked in the review view mirror and smiled at my little smartie pant kids. I was so proud that my teachings had stuck and they actually remember something that I taught them.

“Great job, guys,” I said. “Now make sure if anyone other than those people touches you in your private parts, you tell mommy and daddy right away.”

“Ok, mommy,” rang through the van as all the kids agreed with me.

Wow, I was just beaming with pride. My children are just the smartest ever. They were getting every thing about this important issue I asked them right.

But just to be sure that I had totally hit a home run with teaching the kids about this, I decided to ask one more question.

As I opened the van doors and let the kids out, I asked, “Guys, can you tell me where your private parts are?”

The kids looked at me and then pointed to their ‘private parts’.

Jake pointed to his nose.
Claire pointed to her elbow.
And Quinn pointed to his heart.

They each smiled at me as they pointed and the ran into the house.

Apparently, my children’s private parts are any body part that comes to mind when questioned and the lesson that a private part is actually anything under your bathing suit was lost on them.

But hey, isn’t answering 70% of the questions correctly still a passing grade? Probably not on this issue.


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