Darn You, Disney!

Posted by: , November 15, 2011 in 11:59 am


disney Darn You, Disney!I would do just about anything for my children. I say ‘just about anything’ because I do have my limits. Like I would not eat poop for money for them or I would not touch a frog, snake or lizard because that is just disgusting.

One of the things that I would do for my children is pay close to $70 to take them all to a movie theater to see a movie that we own because it is playing in 3D which happens to give me a headache and makes me want to vomit.

Crazy, I know.

The movie that I took my children to see was The Lion King.

I love that movie. I remember seeing it for the first time with my mom and siblings, sitting in the theater eating popcorn and having the bajeezees scared out of me when after they sing the opening song the big boom happens as the title of the movie comes across the screen.

I want my children to have memories like that. That is what childhood is all about.

Of course, my children probably won’t have memories about seeing this movie because they were too busy swinging on the seats, breaking the 3D glasses and asking to go to the bathroom.

But I try.

Making memories is a process and one I am not going to give up on.

In preparation for taking the kids to see The Lion King, I dug out the sound track CD and we listened to it in the van all the way to the movie. At first, the kids covered their ears and screamed, “No Mommy, No! It hurts my ears!”

But I am happy to say that this CD has grown on them and every time we get in the car, they beg me to play The Lion King music. Of course, every time I have to explain to them what a CD is and why I have to put it in the radio and just can’t push a button to play the music like when they want other music.

(Isn’t it sad our kids probably won’t know CDs. But they sure will know MP3s and iTunes.)

The fact that they are totally into The Lion King music makes my heart burst with joy. I just love that they love something that I liked as a kid.

But there is one problem.

The Lion King songs are just so darn catchy and have this tendency to stay in my head for days. Especially, that song that Scar sings about how he is going to kill King Mufasa and become king himself.*

Apparently, this song has stuck with my children as well.

One morning we were in the grocery store. The kids were being themselves and jumping, running and yelling around the grocery chat knocking products off the shelves and annoying old people.

As I was loading our chat up with milk, I heard Jake and Quinn sing song, “No King! No King! La-la-la-la!”

“Aw, how cute” I thought to myself. “They are playing The Lion King.”

Then I realized what part of the movie they were playing. They were playing Scar’s song and before I could stop Claire from saying the next line which would make old ladies cry, she opened her mouth and screamed,

“IDIOTS!!! THERE WILL BE A KING! I WILL BE A KING!”

There was a gasp heard around the store, a woman fainted and I am pretty sure that I heard of couple of glass jars shatter from people dropping them in horror.

Ok, that last sentence didn’t really happen but it sure felt like it could have happened.

I know that it could have been worse.

She could have screamed ‘Fuck’ through out the store in which case I really would have run into the milk fridge never to return instead of just feeling like I wanted to.

Darn you, Disney for making your movies about parents dying and songs full of words not appropriate for children to scream in crowded grocery stores.

*If this post makes no sense to you because you have not seen the movie, click here to hear the song that I am talking about.


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