Best of the Honest Toddler

Posted by: , March 4, 2013 in 3:01 pm


honest toddlere Best of the Honest ToddlerIf you haven’t read the latest Twitter sensation @HonestToddler then you are missing out. The hilarious insights into the life of a toddler, will have you rolling with laughter. Here are our favorites from this week:

To the person who saw me crying on the grocery store floor and stepped over me to get sea salt, shame on you.

Doctor walked in. Toddler in the next room is singing Wheels On The Bus like we’re all on holiday. Quiet, fool. Stay alert.

As if stickers are going to make up for everything I’ve been through. I’ll take six.

Ear infection. They gave me medicine in my mouth but so far nothing in my actual ear. Where did these people go to school. Hogwarts?

I’m willing to consider doing the right thing as long as the wrong thing doesn’t involve cake.

The Wiggles have to a lot to say about being yourself but those fair-weather friends get real quiet once you end up in time out.

Hope no one wasted tax dollars rescuing the itsy bitsy spider. Going up that spout again was his choice. Dummy.

Just heard Cookie Monster say something about trying new foods. They got to him.

“Listen to your heart.” But what if your heart is telling you not to wear pants?

Funny how she has committed the names of everyone on American Gypsy Wedding to memory but forgot to buy my juice.

Sorry about last night. Guess we both learned something though. You learned to come the first time I call and I learned to never give up.

For 9 months they dreamed about what my face would look like – now they’re watching YouTube videos trying to run out the clock until bedtime.

 


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